Roast Beef Vagina Flaps

The term likens the lips of the vagina (labia majora)—when elongated or stretched in some way—to fleshy, foldy drapery, like slices of roast beef. And so, of course roast beef curtains is a common form of this slang in the US.

Kegel exercises: The feeling of “tightness” during sex is primarily determined by the pelvic floor muscles around the vagina. Kegels are one of the recommended exercises for vagina tightening and beef curtains associated problems. The clench and release exercise is what constitutes the Kegel exercise. Kegel’s exercise is the act of engaging the pelvic floor muscles, holding for 5–10 seconds, and releasing. This is done about 5–10 times in a row, a few times a day. The pelvic floor muscles become stronger because of this and thus help in tightening the vagina.

The energy conducted during the vaginal rejuvenation treatment promotes collagen remodeling, which helps strengthen the support structures of the vagina. The elasticity of the skin and muscles is increased, while the targeted heat tightens and restores the entire vaginal area. ThermiVa is performed in three separate treatments over a course of three months. ALSO SEE: Blue Wafflé Disease

Labioplasty, a cosmetic procedure that involves removing excess skin and reshaping the genital to be more symmetrical is usually done by most people to reduce the size of their labia associated with beef curtains. The surgery may cause bruising or swelling in the vulva, as it heals. The vulva will also be very delicate during the healing process. People will need to take extra care to keep the area clean and dry to avoid infections or bleeding.

Wardrobe Changes: Wearing loose cotton underwear may help to prevent discomfort around the labia. Some people with beef curtains may notice that their discomfort goes away if they stop wearing tight clothing or underwear. Wearing loose-fitting underwear, shorts, and pants may help prevent unnecessary friction in the area. Wearing natural materials, such as cotton or linen, may also help improve airflow around the vulva. Doctors may also be able to provide women with topical ointments to reduce irritation or manage symptoms.

Beef curtains is a serious cause for concern in many women not because of its effect on their health but the implication in their relationships and the notion that v- confidence is the root of confidence for women.

We’ve all been there. Your dapper charming self has wooed a girl by way of traditional date or maybe night time escalation. You get home, the mood is right, the drinks have been flowing and you have convinced her that in fact, yes… sex is a great idea. That magic moment comes when you start undressing her, she is on your bed and lifts her perfectly shaped bottom 6 inches off the duvet cover so you can slide her underwear off. And then you see it…

Hopefully I have saved some of you from the pain generally associated with being lured into the large labia luncheon. So there you have it. Five almost indisputable ways to identify, and consequently avoid, roast beef.

Most fat girls do not have the carcass cape. The reason is simple — the excess fat in and around the pelvic region creates an inverse effect on the vaginal lips, pushing out the blubber and inducing an inwards turn of the labia. Similar to how a black hole operates, the skin is sucked inwards creating the nice vagina effect. While she may pound away a ton of roast beef, at least her nether region will be devoid of any such flap happy activity.

Let’s be honest, those accordion lips take up some extra room. So when you meet a girl at a bar, or the office or maybe a friend’s dinner party, just innocuously bring up the gym and what people wear while they exercise. Mention your underarmour clothing. Tell her you have noticed a trend in yoga pants and spandex leggings for female gym attendees. Does she balk at the idea of wearing things so tight? Does she discuss the “freedom” of loose shorts for exercise? If so, you may have a closet pancake draper. Conversely, if she is one of the major proponents of lululemon pants then you may very well have a lady who sports an = sign for a vagina. Congratulations, a winner is you.

However, god speed to you if you happen to go home with a Marilyn, an Allison, a Brittany or dare I say a Colleen. I hope you have your spelunking gear ready, because it is going to take some cavernous digging to find that clitoris under those goose wings.


  • the labia (i.e. “lips” of the female genitalia.)

    She was unconscious, so I decided to look up her skirt and see her roast beef curtains.

    • See more words with the same meaning: vulva (vagina), female genitalia.

    Last edited on Jun 09 2010. Submitted by Mike M. from Larkspur, CA, USA on Dec 13 2002.

  • FAQ

    What causes roast beef vagina lips?

    One of the common themes of the subreddit is the ‘roast beef theory’. There are plenty of folks who believe your vulva can change after having a lot of sex, so if someone’s labia looks like roast beef it means they’ve had a number of sexual partners.

    What does roast beef flap mean?

    In its most extreme form, the lips of the vagina (labia majora) resemble fleshy, foldy draperies, similar to pieces of roast beef, when they are extended or stretched in some way. As a result, in the United States, roast beef curtains are a frequent version of this slang expression.

    Related Posts